Sunday, January 29, 2012

Hope

Wow, I don't know where to start.

My life is crazy, upside down.
I'm waiting for things to happen
I'm trying to get my feet back on the ground,
I'm trying to find the ground actually.
I'm tired of my life
But I still love it.
I love and miss people
I wish others would disappear off the face of the earth.
I want to scream
I want to laugh
I want to cry
I want to run away.
I wish the computer was more like my Blackberry
But I want my Blackberry to be different.
My tongue is sharp,
Because I am upset.
I feel lonely
But I'm surrounded by people.
I love school
But I hate the work.
I have things to do
But they never get done.
I feel like promises are empty.
I'm confused, alone, afraid, frustrated and just plain angry.
All.the.time.

But in the midst of this pain and loneliness, there is a glimmer of Hope. Hope starts with a gentle tapping on the door to my heart, then a knocking, the a full out banging, then it tries to open the door, realizes it's locked, and bashes it down to reveal itself and bring me out of the dark little corner of self pity once again. And there is Hope.
I need to answer the door to Hope once more.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
Romans 8:28

~Keren